Finding Yourself & Your Style After Divorce


Feeling different, inside and outside post-divorce? It’s totally normal! Once you’re ready to get back out there you want to feel your absolute best, but oftentimes that version of yourself is different from who it was P.D (pre-divorce). As a wardrobe consultant, my job is to make every client feel 100% comfortable when getting back out there, and a big part of that is purging the old and creating the new. 

I know a ‘personal stylist’ sounds to many people like it’s something only for the rich and the famous. But the truth is, no matter who you are or where you go, you have to wake up in the morning and think about how you want to present yourself, which can be overwhelming to most people. And for all of my clients that are going through, or have recently gone through, a divorce, I hear firsthand how important it is for them to find their personal sense of style and get their groove back.

The idea of seeking some assistance in the style and fashion arena is actually one that can save you money in the long term. It’s a service that can help you find the right brands and styles to invest in, so you’re not spending money on the same things you already have, or which may not be the most flattering looks on you. My divorced clients talk a lot about how they feel that they “lost” their sense of who they were in their marriages, and that included in their clothing and wardrobes. Maybe you’ve bought things that you don’t love because your spouse liked them. Or possibly you found yourself putting less and less effort into your clothing over time throughout your marriage, and now you really want to have a fresh new look, but aren’t sure where to start. These things are very common and easily fixable with someone you trust and who has an objective eye.

We’ve all heard and read the tips on purging your closet – if you haven’t worn an item in “x” amount of time, then get rid of it. But that doesn’t always help when it comes time to add some new things to your wardrobe. Getting divorced can bring with it a lot of emotions; sadness, guilt, confusion and depression. But it can also bring with it feelings of excitement about the opportunity for a new start. And feeling good about yourself and how you look and present yourself will help you to put your best foot forward in every way.

Even if it seems intimidating to work with a personal stylist, it’s a gift that you will thank yourself for. And it’s actually really easy! A big focus for women is finding the right pieces to invest in for each body type and personal style. As women, we have so many options it can be overwhelming, so that’s where it really helps to have some help. For men, it’s often more custom and ready-to-wear, and let’s be honest, men usually aren’t as self-assured with their sense of style (and like having a woman’s opinion), so I love helping them get that feeling of confidence back, as well. 

Whether the client is a man or woman, a first consult can be virtual, which helps put people at ease. After getting an idea of who they are and what they need, I would do some online shopping and then they review the cart and whatever they like gets shipped right to them. And I like to make it super simple, so I even track it all and manage any returns, so all they need is tape for the box if they don’t want it! Of course if you work with a stylist that’s in the same city, your appointments can be done in-person at your home and even out on a shopping trip together. Some of my clients in Miami and New York really prefer doing it all in-person, but nowadays so many people love the convenience of styling online without having to leave their own closet!

The ultimate goal is always to stay true to who you are as a person, but to help fine-tune your closet so you can feel your best, while perhaps trying something a little different too! Part of getting back out there is trying something that you haven’t tried before. There really is no downside, and it’s all to help you create a new and better version of yourself!

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